Berkawan tidak salah, bahkan digalakkan kerana ia selaras dengan fitrah dan membawa banyak manfaat sehinggakan dapat membuatkan hidup lebih ceria.
Cuma, berwaspada apabila kawan lebih daripada had, terlalu rapat dan intim, malah sanggup mengorbankan harga diri.
Justeru, Islam menasihati umatnya sentiasa memelihara kesopanan dan tata cara sepanjang masa, terutama apabila bersosial dan berkawan, supaya kebaikan terjaga.
Ulama tersohor, Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, berkata hubungan di antara lelaki dan wanita tidak ditolak secara keseluruhan.
Bagaimanapun, beliau menggariskan beberapa syarat hubungan di antara kedua-dua jantina terbabit, dengan saling merendahkan pandangan dan memastikan tiada pandangan yang disusuli nafsu.
Menurutnya, wanita Islam juga patut prihatin terhadap kod pakaian Islam, yang menutupi seluruh badan, tidak ketat dan menggambarkan bentuk badan.
"Akhlak yang umum sepatutnya diamalkan. Dalam perkataan lain, seorang wanita sepatutnya serius dalam ucapan dan tertib cara berjalan dan melawan godaan syaitan. Tiada wangian dipakai dari rumah."
Nabi s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Mana-mana wanita yang memakai wangian dan kemudian berjalan melalui sekumpulan lelaki dan mereka mencium wangian itu, dia adalah penzina."
Al-Qaradawi juga berkata, lelaki dan wanita (bukan mahram) tidak dibenarkan bersama di satu tempat yang tiada lelaki lain.
Bagaimanapun, perkembangan mutakhir mendapati fenomena memiliki teman istimewa kian menjadi-jadi, seolah-olah ia suatu kebiasaan.
Bagaimanpun, apabila teman terbabit berkelakuan di luar jangkaan, timbullah keburukan, malah bagi pelajar prestasi pelajaran merosot, selera makan menurun, bahkan untuk hidup pun tidak bersemangat.
Bekas Presiden Masyarakat Islam Amerika Utara (ISNA), Dr Muzammil Siddiqi, berkata Muslim memang sepatutnya mempunyai hubungan yang baik dengan semua orang, lelaki dan wanita, di sekolah, tempat kerja dan kawasan kejiranan.
"Tetapi Islam tidak membenarkan mengambil orang bukan mahram sebagai kawan rapat kerana hubungan seperti itu kerap membawa perkara haram.
"Ini memungkinkan mereka melakukan dosa atau menghabiskan banyak masa bersama," katanya sambil mengemukakan ayat 25 Surah an-Nisa sebagai satu hujah atas dakwaan berkenaan.
Perhubungan intim yang membawa kepada pertemuan sosial atau 'dating' boleh mengundang pelbagai mala petaka, seperti rogol, pembunuhan dan persundalan.
Fenomena itu mula bercambah ketika muzik Barat mula memekik dari kereta dan pasangan muda berpegangan tangan di kafeteria. Malah, seks sebelum perkahwinan menjadi suatu fenomena yang semakin menjadi-jadi sejak era revolusi seks 1960-an.
Jurnal Persatuan Perubatan Amerika ada melaporkan, peningkatan bilangan gadis mengadakan pertemuan sosial, berisiko berdepan dengan kekejaman, hamil, penderaan, bahaya tingkah laku seksual dan membahayakan diri.
Berikutan itu, ramai di kalangan gadis menderita secara senyap, tidak memberitahu sesiapa kerana takut atau malu.
Walaupun sesetengah mereka cuba memilih untuk bersuara bagi mendapatkan pembelaan, ia hanya membabitkan sebilangan kes tertentu.
Hari ini, bukan sedikit anak muda yang berada dalam keadaan mengelirukan dan keterpaksaan, bersama masa depan yang kabur selepas terjebak dalam perhubungan intim dengan pasangan masing-masing.
Oleh itu Islam menasihati umatnya berwaspada apabila bersosial dan jangan sampai merugikan diri dan keluarga.
Hakikatnya berkawan tidak salah tetapi jika melanggar nilai agama lebih-lebih lagi bertemu dan berdua-duaan, ia dilarang sama sekali.
Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, dari Institut Islam Toronto, Kanada, berkata pertemuan sosial tentu tidak dibenarkan.
Menurutnya, Islam melarang umatnya berdua-duaan dengan pasangan berlainan jantina kecuali hubungan persaudaraan atau perkahwinan.
"Tidak dibenarkan menurut kehendak nafsu secara bebas, bergaul sembarangan dan bercampur dengan kawan berlainan jantina," katanya.
Nabi Muhammad s.a.w menegaskan: "Apabila seorang lelaki dan wanita duduk bersama mereka ditemani teman ketiga (yang membisikkan kejahatan kepada mereka)."
Katanya, Allah memerintahkan kita bukan saja menahan diri daripada zina tetapi menjauhi daripadanya.
"Menurut hukum ahli fiqah, perkara yang membawa kepada haram juga diputuskan haram. Justeru, apabila pertemuan sosial itu membawa kepada dosa, ia diputuskan haram.
"Jika untuk mengetahui wanita terbabit bagi tujuan perkahwinan, ia dibenarkan tetapi tertakluk kepada etika Islam," katanya.
Oleh Idris Musa Teman tapi mesra
45 Komen:
asal xde sape brani komen hal ni...
sape yg mkn cili akan rase la kepedasannya...
astaghfirullahalzim...
bukan nak belagak atau poyo,...tp bace utk menginsafkan dan menyedarkan diri sendiri ape salahnye kan...
ramai org islam skrg mengngap sesebuah hubungan terlalu ringan hinnga sanggup mengadaikan maruah wlau dgn membe sendiri,last2 anak yg kuar tak tahu siapa bapaknye...kesian.
tundukkan pandangan wahai umat manusia antara manusia berlainan jantina..
naseb bek ak x terlibat..
wahhaaahaa....
sama lah.
tak terlibat.
sentiasa m'nundukkan
pandangan bila lalu
depan lelaki. :-)
betul2....
sy stuju...
x payahlah rapat sgt dgn lelaki tu ha...
buat pening kepala je...
*
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